Just Remember

Three weeks had now passed since I gave my heart to Jesus. (Follow my journey in “My Testimony.”) It had been three weeks since I became what the Bible called a “born again believer.” Now I was different! I was living! And I knew it! But God was still working on me. There were so many things He needed to change in me, and one of them was church attendance.

God wanted to teach me that this place called “church” was the place I needed to spend more of my time and energy. Church was the place I could find true love, acceptance, and draw closer to Jesus.

Remember-Jenny

One Saturday night, after calling my friends, we decided to go to the same hip-hop club we used to attend for more than a year (yes, to the same club from “Knowing the Born Again Me”.) Although my heart didn’t want to do these things anymore, I didn’t know anything else. This is what I did; this is what I knew, so I followed what I felt comfortable with, and by this time I still didn’t know what God says about good company, places to go or things to do. I knew my life was truly changing, but there was so much still to learn about this “new life.” God’s desire was for me to experience a complete transformation, one step at a time. He was in no rush; I already was His, and nothing could take me away from His hands.

We followed the same protocol. We listened to some music, had a few drinks and watched people dance, but after all the false happiness, I finally decided that it was enough and wanted to go home. I don’t have a clear idea why I ended up spending the night at a girlfriend’s house, but as soon as I got there, I went straight to bed.

The night went by fast, and at 8:30 a.m., the sun came through the window and woke me up. It was Sunday morning! It was church morning! But I was tired! Adjusting my blankets and getting more comfortable in the bed, I rolled ever, and went back to sleep, or at least I tried. God had another plan.

As I was closing my eyes and getting all warm and cozy, my friend’s cat began to scratch at the door of my room. He scratched and scratched at the door and wouldn’t let up. I could not believe it, but this was really happening! Of all the places in the house he could go, he decided he wanted to play with the door of the room I was sleeping in. A little frustrated, and still very tired from the night before, I stood up, walked to the door and kicked the door so hard that I think I broke my big toe trying to scare the cat away. But guess what? He was still there. It sounds funny, but in that moment, I was so upset. I really wanted to go back to sleep and do nothing else.

Church was never my priority during those years. I always looked at church as a place you go because it was what some people did on Sunday, but there was not really a commitment or relationship with it. Church was one more thing I could do on Sunday, but on that specific Sunday morning, I didn’t want to go. At all!

After trying so many tactics, and realizing the cat had no plans to move away from the door, I gave up, got up, brushed my teeth, took a shower, got dressed, and with no other plans in mind, I went to church.

Fourteen years have passed since that day, and I still laugh. But I am so thankful that God used one of His creatures to teach me, a new believer, how important church attendance is and to make sure I didn’t skip it. God was teaching me that church is important in a Christian’s life!

I think one of the reasons God wanted me to attend church that morning – and every Sunday after that – was for me to remember what He did inside me that February 20, 2005. He wanted me to remember how I felt that day, the things I saw, the way I was loved. And especially, he wanted me to remember this was the place I wanted and needed to be.

“Remember His marvelous works which He has done” (1 Chronicles 16:12). “Remember the former things of old; for I am God, and there is no other; I am God, and there is none like me” (Isaiah 46:9). God really, really wants us to remember the good things He has done.

It’s so easy for us to focus so much on “surviving” these days that we forget those small but important moments in our walk with the Lord. We forget the days the Lord used to refine us and transform us, like the day the Lord gave us life and saved us from death, the days He provided for us, the days He restored what was broken, the days He gave us a second chance, the days He showed us grace instead of punishment, the days He answered a prayer and gave us the deepest desires of our hearts, the days He removed fears and addictions, the days He gave us victories, and especially the day God gave us His son, Jesus.

Remembering is so valuable to our God. He told the Israelites to place stones near the Jordan River to remember how He dried the waters so the Israelites could could walk through (Joshua 4), He created a feast to remember when the angel of death passed over the Israelites (Exodus 12: 14), He led people to build altars (Genesis 28:10-19; Genesis 35: 1; Exodus 17: 8:6) to remember how God saved them, gave them victories, and helped them defeat their enemies. He doesn’t want us to forget because remembering what God has done will bring peace to our souls, strength to our faith, and victory over any struggle.

What do you need to remember today? What have you forgotten? If you are reading this, maybe it is because there was a time in your life that God did something amazing for you and you need to remember it now. Either to encourage you, to strengthen you, to know that He is control, or to remind you that He loves you and always has. Whatever it is, just remember!

After that morning, 14 years ago, I have fallen in love with my church. There is no other place I would rather be on Sundays. Although it may not seem like it, church is a great place to remember what He has done for me. Church is a time away from life’s busyness, a time to rest, a time to reflect, a time to listen to the word of God, a time to serve others, a time to love, a time to sing praises to my Father, and especially, is a time to remember. Don’t stay asleep, don’t go to other places, come to your Father’s house with an open heart and mind and just remember what He has done!

To The Old Me

“Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead,…” (Philippians 3:13)

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I was angry; I was really upset. I knew everything around me was annoying me, but I didn’t know why. Maybe I was not having a good day, maybe I was just tired, or maybe I was just having a “moment,” but I couldn’t find one reason why I was having these feelings.

As I was walking up and down our driveway pulling a wagon with my two little ones in it, I thought of all the “fun” things I could be doing. I could be in Puerto Rico at my mom’s house in the living room sitting and talking with her and my sister about the good old days, having a good laugh, something that I haven’t had for a while. Or I could be at the beach, like I used to do, with some friends, enjoying the hot sun on my skin, drinking soda and eating Cheetos. Or I could be eating at my favorite restaurant with my male best friend, like we used to do every weekend during my single years, enjoying some music and relaxing. Or I could just be at El Morro (the Fort) – in Puerto Rico, of course – sitting there reading my Bible for hours like I used to do, with no children around calling me “Mommy” every two seconds, whining, crying, asking for snacks and fighting for a toy each one of them believed they had first.

Then I stopped, looked up to heaven, and a gentle breeze on my face reminded me of other things I could be doing. I could be crying out to God in my bedroom, like I did so many times, begging for a husband and wondering if I would ever get married. I could be in El Morro wondering what it would be like to have children that call me “Mommy” every two seconds. I could be coming back home from a nice dinner with my male best friend, sad, because I was driving alone again another night and had nobody to share my dreams with. Or I could be sitting in my mom’s living room, listening to the same old TV shows, having the same old conversations, sleeping on the same old bed, tired of living there, ready to move out.

So, to the “old me,” I am telling you: stop telling me that my life was better before. Stop telling me that I liked it better when I was single. Stop yelling straight to my ears that I shouldn’t have had so many children. Stop telling me that there is no hope or purpose for my life. Stop telling me that I had freedom before I moved here, or that a life without restrictions was better. Stop telling me that God does not care or doesn’t love me enough! Stop!

The “old me” in us – or Satan – will always make us feel defeated. It will make us believe that whatever is ahead of us is not worthy of thankfulness.

Remember the Israelites? They desired so much to be back to the suffering they had in Egypt. They complained so much of the small trials they faced on the road. They were beaten in Egypt; they were suffering from hunger and abuse, and they didn’t hope or believe their lives would ever in a million years change.

But God had a plan for them, a beautiful and amazing purpose so big that in their tiny minds and unbelieving hearts they couldn’t see it. They rejected it, bringing condemnation on some of them to the point that they never tasted the Promised Land; they never arrived! (See the book of Exodus.)

As I think about these people and how they listened so much to their “old me,” I need to remember that this is who I am right now, that my hope is only in Jesus, and that I am called to wait patiently (Psalm 27:14) and to love and submit to my husband (Ephesians 5:22). I am called to love and instruct my children in the Lord (Ephesians 6:4). I am called to believe the Lord indeed has a plan and a purpose for my life (Jeremiah 29:11), that I am loved (Jeremiah 31:3), I am chosen (John 15:16), and I am redeemed (Isaiah 43:1). I am called to believe that it is good to be thankful for what I have (Colossians 3:15), to be gracious, to rest in Him (Matthew 11:28), and to trust (Proverbs 3:5), and that He is doing a new thing in me (Isaiah 43:19a) More than anything I need to remember that this is who I am now. There is no going back!

Think about this. Are you like me? What is your “old you” telling you?

Whatever your old you is telling you, tell it to be quiet! Tell it that you are a new person, that you have a new life. Tell it that this is the will of God for you. Tell it that with God’s grace you will enjoy it and be joyful and thankful because there is indeed hope for you; there is indeed life.

Repent, pray, ask, believe, have faith, and please, don’t give up your new life! It’s a beautiful life! Like Paul said: “Forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead” because God’s plan for our lives is good!

Para: La “yo de antes”

“Hermanos, yo mismo no pretendo haberlo ya alcanzado; pero una cosa hago: olvidando ciertamente lo que queda atrás, y extendiéndome a lo que está delante,…” Filipenses 3:13

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Estaba de mal humor; Estaba molesta, pero no sabía por qué. Quizás no estaba teniendo un buen día, tal vez estaba cansada, o tal vez estaba teniendo uno de esos “momentos” que toda mujer tiene, pero por más que lo pensaba, no podía encontrar una razón para sentirme de esta forma.

Mientras caminaba de un lado a otro en la acera, empujando el vagón de juguete con mis hijos, pensaba en todas las cosas “divertidas” que podría estar haciendo. Podría estar en Puerto Rico en la casa de mi mama en la sala, sentada, hablando con ella y con mi hermana sobre los viejos tiempos, riéndome a carcajadas, algo que no he hecho en mucho tiempo. O podría estar en la playa, como solía hacer, con algunos amigos, disfrutando del sol caliente, bebiéndome un refresco y comiendo Cheetos. O podría estar cenando en mi restaurante favorito con mi mejor amigo, como solía hacerlo todos los fines de semana durante mis años como soltera, disfrutando de música y tranquila. O podría estar en El Morro (el Fuerte) en Puerto Rico por supuesto, sentada allí leyendo mi Biblia durante horas como solía hacerlo, sin niños a mi alrededor llamándome “mami” cada dos segundos, lloriqueando, quejándose, pidiendo meriendas y peleando por un juguete que cada uno de ellos piensa que lo tenía primero.

Luego me detuve, miré al cielo y una brisa en mi rostro me recordó otras cosas que también podría estar haciendo. Podría estar clamando a Dios, como lo hice tantas veces, en mi habitación en Puerto Rico rogando por un esposo, y preguntándome si alguna vez me casaría. Podría estar en El Morro (el Fuerte) preguntándome cómo sería tener hijos que me llamaran mamá cada dos segundos. Podría estar de regreso a mi casa después de cenar con mi mejor amigo, triste, porque una vez más estaba sola en el carro y no tenía a nadie con quien compartir mis sueños, o podría estar sentado en la sala, en la casa de mi mama, escuchando lo mismo, viejos programas de televisión, las mismas viejas conversaciones, durmiendo en la misma cama, cansada de vivir allí, loca por mudarme.

Entonces, a la “ yo de antes” le digo: deja de decirme que mi vida era mejor en el pasado; deja de gritar a mis oídos que no debí tener tantos hijos; Deja de decirme que no hay esperanza ni propósito para mi vida; Deja de decirme que tenía más libertad antes de mudarme aquí, o que una vida sin restricciones era mejor, deja de decirme que a mi Dios no le importo o que no me ama lo suficiente! ¡Para ya!

El “yo de antes” en nosotros o Satanás siempre nos hará sentir derrotados. Nos hará creer que todo lo que esta delante de nosotros, no es digno de agradecimiento.

¿Te acuerdas de los israelitas? ¿Los escogidos de Dios? cómo deseaban tanto volver al sufrimiento que tenían en Egipto. Se quejaban tanto de las pequeñas pruebas que estaban enfrentando en el camino. Fueron golpeados en Egipto, sufrían hambre y fueron maltratados, y no esperaban o creían que sus vidas algún día cambiaría, en millones de años.

Pero Dios tenía un plan para ellos, un propósito hermoso y maravilloso. Tan grande, que en sus pequeñas mentes y en sus corazones incrédulos no pudieron verlo y lo rechazaron, trayendo condenación para algunos de ellos hasta al punto de que no llegaron a probar la tierra prometida, ¡nunca! (libro del éxodo)

Pensando en la vida de estas personas y en cómo escucharon tanto a su “viejo yo”, tengo que recordar que esta es la mujer que soy ahora, que mi esperanza está solo en Jesús, que estoy llamada a esperar pacientemente (Salmo 27: 14), a amar y someterme a mi esposo (Efesios 5:22). Estoy llamada a amar e instruir a mis hijos en el Señor (Efesios 6: 4). Estoy llamada a creer que el Señor tiene un plan y un propósito para mi vida (Jeremías 29:11). Que soy amada (Jeremías 31: 3), soy elegida (Juan 15:16), soy redimida (Isaías 43: 1), que es bueno para mi vivir agradecida por lo que tengo (Colosenses 3:15), que debo descansar en Sus promesas (Mateo 11:28), confiar con todo mi corazón en su voluntad para mi (Proverbios 3: 5) y que El está haciendo algo nuevo en mi (Isaías 43:19ª). Especialmente debo recordar que esta es quien soy ahora y que no hay vuelta atrás.

¿Y tú? ¿Eres como yo? ¿Qué te está diciendo la “tú de antes”?

Lo que sea que te esté diciendo, ¡dile que se calle! Dile que eres una nueva mujer, que te deje de mentir, que tú tienes una vida nueva. Dile que esta es la voluntad de Dios para tu vida, y que con la ayuda de Dios la vas a disfrutar, vas a estar alegre y agradecida porque hay esperanza para ti, de hecho, vas a empezar a vivir hoy.

¡Arrepiéntete! ora, pide, cree, ten fe, pero por favor, ¡no te rindas! Como dijo el Apóstol Paul: “Olvidando las cosas que están atrás y alcanzando las cosas que están adelante …” Filipenses 3:13 ¡porque el plan de Dios para nuestras vidas es bueno!

Mi Testimonio

untitled (38 of 41) ¡Hola! me llamo Yanelba! Soy puertorriqueña, esposa de pastor y madre de cinco hermosos niños. Me mudé a Nueva York después de que mi esposo y yo nos casáramos en 2010 y ese mismo año el comenzó el ministerio a tiempo completo.

Mi vida es un hermoso testimonio de la redención y la gracia de Dios. A los 27 años experimenté la verdadera libertad, la libertad de las adicciones, las drogas, el alcohol y la inmoralidad sexual y sus consecuencias. Experimenté la libertad de la búsqueda del amor, la seguridad, la identidad y la vida. Esta libertad la encontré cuando le entregué mi vida a Jesucristo el 20 de febrero de 2005.

Yo crecí bajo las enseñanzas de la fe católica. Fui bautizada de bebé y eventualmente seguí todos los pasos requeridos para demostrar que era una mujer de fe, ¡una fe que realmente no entendía!

Cuando tenía seis años, mis padres se divorciaron. Esta triste experiencia me alejo cada vez más de un Dios que creía conocer. Este era un dios falso. Este era el dios que veía en las pinturas colgadas en la pared, en la borrachera de un amigo o en sonrisa falsa de un niño. Yo Pensaba que el único trabajo de este dios era suplir todas mis necesidades y quedarse callado en las decisiones de mi vida.

Después de un tiempo caminando sin dirección, cansada por las cargas de la vida, y preguntándome una y otra vez: “¿Cuál es mi propósito?”, Una amiga me invitó a una iglesia cristiana (Iglesia Comunidad Cristiana de Amor, Guaynabo PR) y, en mi desesperación, acepté su invitación. No tenía idea de lo que iba a ver allí, pero sabía que “este Dios” podría ayudarme.

Entré a una iglesia que nunca había estado antes; el ambiente era diferente, la gente era diferente e incluso la música era diferente. Entré, conseguí un asiento y me senté. Con mis manos colocadas en mi falda, espere hasta que terminaran las canciones. Estaba lista para escuchar lo que el pastor tenía que decir. No recuerdo ninguna de las palabras que el predicador dijo ese día, pero sí recuerdo muy vívidamente cómo, después de un llamado al altar, camine hacia adelante, acompañada de mi amiga Sheila Conley.

Aunque no sabía qué esperar o qué estaba haciendo, tenía la sensación de que esto era lo correcto. El pastor estaba orando y poniendo sus manos sobre otras personas. También él puso sus manos sobre mi cabeza, oró en voz alta por mí y me bendijo. ¡Inmediatamente, un deseo de dejar todo irse me sobrecogió! En ese momento desee renunciar a mis propios caminos. Entonces me di cuenta de que algo nuevo estaba sucediendo dentro de mí.

¡Entonces supe! ¡Entonces probé! ¡Entonces conocí a mi Salvador! ¡Conocí a Jesús! Por primera vez en mi vida experimenté un amor que nunca antes había sentido. ¡Experimenté vida!

La gente me abrazó, me dio la bienvenida y lo más importante, les interesaba saber de mí. No me hicieron preguntas (aunque en el momento adecuado, compartí mi vida con ellos). No me juzgaron ni formaron opiniones sobre mí; simplemente me amaron por quien era en ese momento. Más tarde, estas mismas personas fueron las que Dios utilizo para moldear mi vida cristiana, para caminar conmigo y para mostrarme el camino correcto.

Una de las cosas que siempre recordaré acerca de estos hombres y mujeres de Dios es que me buscaron. Ellos me llamaban, me ayudaron, se reunían conmigo; estaban caminando a mi lado, paso a paso. En esa iglesia y en muchas otras iglesias, puedo registrar a todas las personas que Dios puso en mi vida durante todos estos años, verdaderos adoradores y siervos del único Dios, Jesús.

Año tras año seguí creciendo en el Señor, no sin sufrimiento o pruebas, pero supe entonces y todavía sé que no quiero nada más, solo quiero Jesús. ¡Ese día en 2005, Dios me trajo de la oscuridad a la luz! ¡En un momento! Nunca tuve esa lucha en querer el mundo de vuelta otra vez; nunca luché con escoger entre dos direcciones; Nunca luché con las dudas de a quién estaba siguiendo. Alabo a Jesús porque me dio las fuerzas para mantenerme firme y caminar en la verdad.

Hay mucho más de mi vida anterior que podría compartir contigo: los pecados, las tentaciones, las adicciones, la inmoralidad sexual, las mentiras, los robos, la brujería, podría seguir y seguir. ¡Pero en todo esto Jesús ha vencido! “Por lo tanto, si alguien está en Cristo, él es una nueva creación; las cosas viejas han pasado; he aquí, todas las cosas se han vuelto nuevas. ”2 Corintios 5:17

Qué hermoso es saber que soy una nueva creación. Que mi vida pasada ya no tiene poder sobre mí.

Oro y espero que mis escrituras sean de bendición para ti y para que el testimonio de la gracia, redención, perdón y la ayuda de Jesús en mi vida te acerque más a Él.

¡Alabado sea el Señor! ¡Solo a Él sea toda la gloria por los siglos de los siglos! Amen

Knowing the Born Again Me

“Jesus answered and said to him, ’Most assuredly, I say to you, unless one is
born again, he cannot see the kingdom of God.’” (John 3:3)

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One week had passed since I gave my life to Jesus. Remember when I got
invited to a Christian church by a friend? (If you haven’t read my story, go to “My Testimony.”) Now I was saved, I had tasted grace, but now what?

The week following that Sunday, I was spiritually different. Now, if I were to
die, I would go straight to heaven, not as before. Jesus’ blood had washed me and
had cleansed me from all unrighteousness. I was born again! But what does it
really mean to be “born again”? I didn’t know it yet, but Jesus was ready to show
it to me.

The next Saturday came, and I was ready for some fun. For the previous
year, some friends and I would go to a hip-hop club to dance, have some drinks
and maybe meet a “new man” (at least, that was my plan). But now, I wasn’t the
same; I was another person, and God wanted me to experience His light in a very
impactful way. He wanted me to taste it and to know what it truly means that He
is the Light of the world.

It was 10 p.m., and I was ready to meet with my friends at the club. As
always, I had a new outfit, my hair was done, and I had a lot of makeup on. I
arrived at this place, and as usual I skipped the line because of special treatment
we had received. When I walked through the door to go inside, I couldn’t believe
what I experienced: a bright and shining light came straight to my eyes and my
soul. This wasn’t a light coming from the building; it was a very special light. I
stood up for a second, and immediately, the first thought that came to my mind
was: what am I doing here? I still remember very clearly how I felt so
uncomfortable for the way I was dressed, and how disgusted I was with the way
other women were dancing. A week ago, I loved to dance like that, but for some
reason, that day, I knew this wasn’t right. In a moment, I felt that this wasn’t my
place anymore; everything was wrong. My clothes, the dancing, the attitude of
some people, and even the drinking was wrong (although it took a little longer for
me to remove it from my life). What I felt in that moment was an amazing
assurance that I was Christ’s.

Later I understood that this light was the light of Jesus coming out from
within me, letting me see, with clarity, what was in front of me. Later I
understood that I had been born again.

That night at the club, I had two options: I could ignore what Jesus was
showing me and go with what I knew, being “nice” to my friends so they wouldn’t
be upset with me and everything would go as smoothly as possible, or I could go
toward what was right and follow Jesus calling me to renounce all wrong, which I was able to do because of the power that was within me through the Holy Spirit.

In the Bible, we can see the story of an adulterous woman (John 8:1-11).
After this woman met Jesus in a very humbling way, she received His forgiveness
and was changed. She followed Jesus. She didn’t want to be an
adulterous woman anymore. Also, we see the life of a man named Zacchaeus who
also met with Jesus and was changed. He left his old life and began a new one. He
didn’t want to be a thief anymore (Luke 19:1-9).

Is it possible to believe in God but not be born again? Yes, I believe so. We
can see how the Pharisees and the teachers of the law believed there was a God,
the God of their Fathers, the God of Abraham, but they weren’t born again. They
didn’t want to be changed by Jesus. There was so much pride in their hearts that
they rejected salvation. They still were believing and holding onto their old
traditions and works as their only way to heaven. Jesus made it clear in John 3:3
that you need to be born again to see the Kingdom of heaven. These people
needed to die to their old flesh, their old traditions, and be born again, with a new
heart and a new soul. Jesus said, “If you are not born again, you cannot see the
Kingdom of God” (John 3:3).

So, what then? Are you a born again believer? Have you been changed? Do
you say you believe in Jesus, but you are still okay with your old sins? Have you felt
convicted and disgusted by your sins? Or not yet?

Many years have passed since that night, but the more I walked with my
Lord and grew up in my faith, the more I understood that I should not have any
part with darkness. I am called to be different. The old Yanelba died, and the new Yanelba was born. I desired to obey my parents, to pay my bills, to stop lying, to stop stealing, to stop cursing, to stop drinking, to stop my promiscuous life and to stop all darkness in me and I could do it only because of Jesus. This was good, so why would I desire something else?

I pray the light of Jesus helps you see if there is any darkness in you and
that He will help you confess it and repent from it, and that you become truly a
born again believer. But as we continue growing in our walk with Christ,
remember that if you are Christ’s you are forgiven, that His grace is enough, and
that He loves you very much. Jesus is the light of the world, and in Him there is not darkness at all!

The Best of God

“Do not be unequally yoked together with unbelievers. For what fellowship has righteousness with lawlessness? And what communion has light with darkness? ¹⁵And what accord has Christ with Belial? Or what part has a believer with an unbeliever?” (2 Corinthians 6:14-15)

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I met my husband when I was 30, married him at 31, had our first baby girl at 32, and at 39 we were welcoming our 5th child.

Life has been going so fast since the time I said “I do” in a small church in New York. It didn’t seem so fast almost 10 years ago when I was waiting for a spouse. Things were going slow and they seemed hopeless. I was almost 30 years old, had no idea if I would ever get married and, worse than that, the guys that I dated or were around me didn’t seem in that moment a perfect fit for what God had showed me through His word of how a Christian man and husband should be.

One day at church, I heard of a close friend that had met his wife on an online site. Why couldn’t I do the same? So, without asking questions, I ran to my computer the same day and signed in to a popular Christian dating site. In around a week, I met a new guy. I met the man that was going to be my husband, but of course, I didn’t know it.

Things were going pretty good, and I had a sense that I was on my way to something, until this man, after exactly one month of phone conversations and long distance dating, sent me an email telling me that we shouldn’t be talking anymore. He said that “this thing” – whatever we had – wasn’t working. This broke my heart. For a moment I thought this was the man I should have married, but apparently, he wasn’t thinking the same way.

I let go, and with tears in my heart and a sense that maybe I would never get married, I gave my desires to the Lord. I remember very clearly how I kneeled one day and asked Jesus to send me a husband, that there were so many temptations around me, that I didn’t want to fall into them and that I was losing all source of hope. I promised that I was going to wait on Him, that I was not going to search on dating sites or other places for what only He could give me. I was tired, but I finally understood.

Time passed, and what I thought were wasted days were indeed days of victories. In Puerto Rico I was growing in the Lord. I was trusting more in His word and I was falling more and more in love with my Savior.

In New York, this man, Trevor, was also growing in his faith, learning to have a living relationship with the God He believed as a child and letting go of some of the sinful patterns he had adopted growing up.

One year and a month after our last conversation, Trevor was on his way to work listening to a sermon on the radio when he felt moved by the Spirit. He pulled over and, drowning in tears (he told me later), asked the Lord for His forgiveness and His help. He confessed that he didn’t want this sinful life anymore and that he was ready to receive what God promised him many years before when he gave his heart to Jesus at 5 years old. It was the new life that was always waiting for him, a holy life, a life set apart for Jesus, a life full of mercies and grace and forgiveness, a life of hope and future, a life that only Jesus could give him. Trevor was ready.

A year and two months had now passed since our last conversation, a month since Trevor rededicated his life to the Lord, and we both were still single, waiting on God.

One day, wondering if he would ever have a wife, and with a new life in his hands, he decided to search for me on Facebook, and guess what? He found me!

I was very surprised that Trevor was again back in my life. Many things were going on in my life during those moments, things that I will probably share another time, but in that moment, it felt right to speak with him again.

Hope filled my heart. I started dreaming again, and in no time, I fell in love with him. Trevor meanwhile had already heard from God that I was going to be his wife. He knew that I was the woman he was going to marry.

On August 26, 2009, we met in person for the first time. On December 24th, 2009, he proposed, and on March 27, 2010, I became Mrs. Price.

Waiting for a spouse is not easy. At all! But believing that God wants the best for you in a spouse makes waiting worth it. When I connected with Trevor online the first time in March 2008, he wasn’t the best God wanted for me. God allowed us, through suffering, to wait until He could let Trevor become the best He had for me, and until I could become the best God had for Trevor.

We need to remember that God’s idea of “the best” is not multiple partners, picking partners here and there. God brought just one woman to Adam, not many (Genesis 2:22-23). It is not based on free trials or “test drives” (talking on sexual terms) (1 Corinthians 6:18). It is not based on having fun, who cares who I date? (Proverbs 19:16). And it is not based on missionary dating – dating an unbeliever hoping to bring them to the Lord someday (2 Corinthians 6:14).

God’s idea of “the best” is waiting, trusting, believing, letting go of the old, surrendering, crying out to God, repenting, being transformed, walking with boldness and confidence, serving, praying, growing, and being different. God’s idea of the best is the BEST OF GOD, no question!

Dear Singles, wait on the Lord, be hopeful. God hasn’t forgotten about you. It’s not easy, I know! But don’t give in to trash. Wait on the Lord; wait for the best! Wait for His best!

In God alone

“No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or else he will be loyal to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and mammon.” (Matthew 6:24)

Devotion-Real-Women-of-God

The other night, exhausted and with no energy at all, I went to my room for a “quiet” time with my Lord. Although I don’t always find the time, I look forward to this moment.

As I sat down in my bed, I began to worship and praise Jesus, raising my hands to heaven with a thankful and overwhelmed heart. I began to pray, and a strange desire of giving up everything for Him grew in my heart. While tears of joy rolled down my face, I opened my mouth and confessed that I didn’t want anything else in my life but only Jesus. I gave everything back to him: my life, my children, and all my earthly possessions. My only desire was to serve Him and to proclaim His name to all nations (or people around me, to make it easy). It was a beautiful time; I cannot deny it.

But what happened the next morning would definitely surprise you.

As I woke up the next morning and started with my daily routine, I began to complain about the bathroom, and how dirty and old it was. Wet towels were on the floor from the night before, toothbrushes and wet toys were by the door, and the old wallpaper and rusted and broken tiles completed the list. In the kitchen the smell of old cabinets went straight to my nostrils, so I lighted up a candle with a fresh vanilla scented I had bought a week ago.

I began to think about how much I desire to change the old carpet that has been laying in the living room for more than 40 years and how a new and more suitable car for our family would be great. But wait a second, wasn’t I in less than 24 hours ago giving all to Jesus and telling Him how I didn’t need anything else but only Him?

If you have experience something like this, I want to tell you that you are not alone. I have been dealing with this for quite a while. The question we must asked ourselves is, what side are we on? Are we desiring more of Jesus or more of the world?

Matthew 6:24 says “No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or else he will be loyal to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and mammon.”

How can our hearts love two different things 100%? It’s impossible! To love something 100% we must let go of something else. It is like trying to go on a mission overseas while staying home; like trying to be a stay at home mom while working outside the home; like wanting to lose weight while eating cupcakes at night. Jesus says it, we cannot serve two masters. Either I want everything from Him or I want nothing; there is not a “happy medium.”

As I meditate on this, I need to know and believe that God is sovereign over all things. There is nothing that happens that catches Him by surprise. By being Sovereign He knows what’s best and has a perfect plan for us. Completely, no doubt!
If God thinks I need a new house, He will give it to me. If He thinks I need a new bathroom, carpet or a new car, He will give it to me, and if He thinks we need anything else other than what we have now (which has been given to us by Him as well), He will give it to us in His divine and perfect time.

This is what it means to completely trust in our Father. To walk every day with a sense of peace that our lives are in completely order. He is giving us the best, His best, and there is nothing we can do to gain more grace or to earn His favor. He knows and control everything!

In the meantime, while I put in practice this, I will praise Him for His grace, for when we are weak, then we are strong.

The heaviest Cross

“If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow Me.” (Luke 9:23)

For quite a while I questioned what Jesus really meant by saying, “If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow Me.” Did He mean that we can’t have dreams or visions, or desire new things? Does this mean that we have to literally carry a cross or deny all kinds of pleasure in this world?

Although the Bible speaks about the love of money being the root of all evil (1 Timothy 6:10), I don’t believe Jesus was primary referring to the external, to the things we have, but by saying this, He was more concerned about our heart.

In Jesus’ days, the Jews were suffering under the Roman Empire and were hoping that a “Savior” would come and free them from the torture and abuse they were receiving day in and day out. They were surprised to know that this “Savior” named Jesus came with a different purpose. He came to transform them from the inside out, and through this transformation, to offer them an eternal reward in heaven. The Jews needed to know that there was a different way of living, that there was beauty in the suffering and that there was indeed hope. By denying themselves and trusting in Jesus, they could handle the Roman pressure; they could carry this heavy cross.

Before Jesus came, the Jews’ attitude toward the Romans wasn’t right. They were not humbling themselves; they were not giving into service to their leaders; they were not forgiving, and especially, they were not loving their enemies, they were angry! They were living in the “flesh.” Through Jesus’ teachings, the Jews were called to deny themselves, to die to their sinful desires and to do what for them seemed impossible. They were called to carry their cross. Jesus’ idea was to teach them that through the Spirit they could indeed carry this cross, the Roman empire, love their enemies (Matthew 5:43-48) and be changed.

Through His word Jesus is teaching us to learn to “deal” with the burden of this life. We also are not promised to be free of the oppression of this world, our enemies or our suffering, but to “take up” our cross and follow Jesus. By doing this we learn how to turn our pride into service, our anger into forgiveness, our jealousy into praises, our disappointments into lessons, our fears into faith, our anxiety into peace and our hatred into love. Jesus’ desire is to help us “take up” our cross because the heaviest cross we are called to carry is our own life.

This is the life God has given to us; this is the cross God has given us to “take up.” Whether you are poor or rich, this is the calling from God to you (1 Samuel 2:7; 1 Chronicles 29:12). Everyone of us has a cross and carrying this cross and following Jesus means the salvation of our soul (Luke 9:23b). We must deny our desires and take up the cross given to us and follow Jesus. The idea is that by following our Lord, this cross becomes so much lighter to take up (Matthew 6), but the reward becomes higher: eternity with God! The more we follow Jesus, the lighter the cross becomes, and the lighter the cross becomes, the higher the reward; Heaven. Wow!

The thought that Jesus was more concerned about our heart and our denying of the flesh and was encouraging us through His word to carry our cross daily, made me think about my own life. Am I denying my sinful desires? Am I involved in the give me, serve me culture? Do I complain and whine for the things I believe I deserve? Have I accepted the cross that has been given to me?

Am I more concerned about getting credit for the things I do? Am I more concerned about my wants than my giving? Am I more concerned about my future and my dreams than the “day by day” and living it to the max for Jesus’ sake? What about you? Are you different? Are you dying daily? Are you taking up your cross and receiving it by faith?

As I write, I know that I can leave this writing here and let it be just a thought that wanders in my mind, but will I put this into practice today? Will I deny all my fleshly desires just to live the life Jesus is asking me to live? Will I love, forgive, serve, submit, listen, help, and be patient. Will I? Will you?

I pray we will, but as we continue living this life, praise Him constantly and know that even when we fail, His grace is enough for us!

My Testimony

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Hi! My name is Yanelba! (Jah-nel-buh) I am a Puerto Rican, a pastor’s wife, and a mother of five beautiful children. I moved to New York after my husband Trevor and I got married in 2010 and he began full-time ministry the same year.

My life is a beautiful testimony of God’s redemption and grace. At 27 years old I experienced true freedom, freedom from addictions, drugs, alcohol, and sexual immorality and its consequences. I experienced freedom from the search for love, security, identity and life. I found this freedom when I gave my life to Jesus Christ on February 20^th, 2005.

I grew up under the teachings of the Catholic faith. I was baptized as a baby and followed all the requirements to show that I was a woman of faith – a faith that I never understood!

When I was six, my parents got divorced. This sad experience was pulling me more and more away from a God I thought I knew. But this was a false god. This was the god I saw in pictures, in the drunkenness of a friend and in the fake smile of a child. I thought this false god’s only role was to supply all our needs and be quiet about our life decisions.

After so much wondering and tiredness from the burdens of this life, and asking myself over and over again: “What is my purpose?,” I was invited to a Christian church by a friend, and in my desperation, I accepted her invitation. I had no idea what I was going to see there, but I knew that “this God” could help me.

I went into a church I had never been to before; the environment was different, the people were different and even the music was different. I came inside, found a seat and sat down. With my hands placed in my lap, I sat shamefully and waited until the songs were over. I was ready to hear what the pastor had to say. I don’t remember any of the words the preacher said that day, but I do remember so vividly how, after an altar call, I went forward, accompanied by my friend Sheila Conley.

Although I did not know what to expect or what I was doing, I had a feeling that this was the right thing to do. The pastor was praying and laying hands on people. He placed his hands on my head, prayed out loud for me, and blessed me. Immediately, the desire to let go overtook me! I had this desire to give up my own ways and a realization that something new was happening inside me.

Then I knew! Then I tasted! Then I met my Savior! I met Jesus! For the first time in my life, I experienced a love I had never felt before. I experienced life!

People hugged me, welcomed me and, more importantly, they were interested in my life. They didn’t ask me questions (although at the right time, I shared my life with them). They didn’t judge me, or form opinions about me; they just loved me for who I was in that moment. Later on these same people were the ones God used to mold my Christian life, to walk with me, and to show me the right path.

One of the things I will always remember about these loving men and women of God is that they followed through with me. They called me, helped me, met with me; they were walking by my side, step by step. In that church and in many other churches, I can record all the people that God has placed in my life during all these years, true worshipers and servants of the only true God, Jesus.

Year after year I continued growing in the Lord, not without suffering and trials, but I knew then and still know that I don’t want anything else, only Jesus. That day in 2005, God brought me from darkness to light! In a moment! I never struggled with wanting the world back again; I never struggled with walking two ways; I never struggled with doubts of who I was following. I praise Jesus that He gave me the strength to stay firm and to walk in truth.

There is so much more of my old life that I could share with you: the sins, the temptations, the addictions, the loss of babies, the sexual immorality, the lies, the thefts, the witchcraft – I could go on and on. But in all this Jesus has overcome! “Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; old things have passed away; behold, all things have become new.” 2 Corinthians 5:17

What a beautiful idea that I am a new creation. That my old life has no power over me anymore.

I pray that you will be blessed by my writings and be moved by the testimonies of Jesus’ grace, redemption, forgiveness, and help in my life.

Praise the Lord! To Him alone be the glory for ever and ever!

Are you a jealous woman?

Jealous woman

A dear friend and I decided to start a “media fast” to help us focus on God and His word, with minimal distraction. I began this fast searching for wisdom, guidance and physical healing for some horrible acid reflux pain, but what I received was more than I could ever imagine.

The Lord used this fast to show me something different, to show me something deeper. He used this fasting to show me that I am a jealous and envious woman. I know, I was in shock too! Come on! How am I going to deal with this ugly and disgusting sin?

For quite a while I have been struggling with celebrating the victories of a friend, especially related to her ministry. As I was trying to post a Christian message on Facebook, the computer froze. While getting upset and frustrated with the computer, this friend came to my mind. I asked myself again why she kept doing the “good” things she was doing and who gave her the authority to do what she does. Immediately, the Spirit told me: “Who gave you the authority to post things about me on Facebook? For the same reason you want to bless your friends here, she wants to bless her friends there.” WOW! It was such a clear voice. This was like a bucket of cold water thrown in my face, but it was true. Why did I think that my ministry or calling was better or more important than hers or somebody else’s?

As a pastor’s wife, I tend to focus on other people’s sins, struggles and problems, forgetting my own sins and leading me to think that I am okay and have nothing to worry about. But as I kept thinking about this, I remembered that we are all here for the same reason: to bring glory to the Almighty, to make Him shine in the darkness, to bring salvation to those who are far. So, whether through writings, service, teaching, music or anything else you do, EVERYTHING is for Him and given by Him, so why do we fight with one another so much?
We need to realize that we are not the only ones called to do something great.

I was so glad that my fast brought more than wisdom, direction or physical healing. The Lord was thinking of something bigger: my spiritual healing. The best of all is that by showing me this, He gave me the opportunity to confess it and repent. Even if we have a reason for the way we feel, that doesn’t make it right to hold onto sin and make it part of our lives. This brought so much freedom to me, freedom that I was not looking for, but I was glad I found.

By the way, I also found freedom from my pain by changing the food I eat. It’s a long story but to experience changes in our lives and freedom from pain and sin, we cannot keep doing the same old, same old. There must be changes in our minds, hearts and way of doing things. As we do that, we experience a freedom that we probably have never experienced before: God’s freedom.
Are you, like me, a jealous and envious woman? Does your heart beat with anger when you see somebody else’s victories or doing God’s work? Are you jealous of your friend’s house, car, family, children or blessings? If so, you are in the right place, just where God wants you. Right now, He is giving you the opportunity to confess it and repent. Today is the day! Don’t wait!